What really grinds your gears?

Barnmouser Ash · Grand Prix

What really grinds your gears?

justice · Grand Prix

Rudeness transforms to entertainment for me, at least here in cyberville. Most of the rude ones that I have encountered have proven quickly to be insecure and easily offended. Hard NOT to play with THEM but a better person will not kick the one going/gone down : )

My pet peeve in forum activity is the arrogant without substance kind and the ones that will ask a good question but argue with/justify against acting on ALL the usually good advice given. That, and the freedom with which some folks dispense veterinary advice.

Barbara F · Grand Prix

I was just thinking about this yesterday, because I posted something non-horse-related on a forum and was completely ignored, even though I was adding information that was critical to the discussion. It got me thinking about how similar some forums are to high school cliques and how LUCKY we are here that everyone is friendly and welcoming. Yay for us!!!

Jackie Cochran · Advanced

I did some stuff on another forum, a big one. I finally gave up on it because so many of the comments were extremely negative and personal. I did not get attacked, but so many of the comments to other people were way too negative and much for me.

This is one reason I LOVE Barnmice. The super negativity is not allowed to take hold here. Good job, Barnmice Administration!!!

Barnmice Admin · Well Schooled

Thanks Jackie!
Thank goodness, we seem to attract the best people, so I almost never have to moderate anything!! :)

Barnmouser Ash · Grand Prix

Another reason I absolutely love Barnmice, as Jackie said! Everyone here is friendly and there are rarely disputes. If there are disputes, there is no name-calling, and generally we can get over it by shaking hands and moving on. Some forums will kick you while you're down, throw you in a rubbish bin and then roll you down a hill into a river. Luckily the forum I posted about earlier ^ lightened up some and it just seemed to be one ignorant, arrogant person ;) my favourite!

What about your pet peeves at the stable? I really can't stand when people leave their things lying around. Not only is it asking to get moved/stolen/etc thus resulting in a temper tantrum from the owner (unwarranted, as they should have locked their things away), but I'm a bit OCD about things beat tidy. Simply can't stand it when people think the barn is their personal bedroom :) Elitist snob riders/owners/managers/trainers also put me off. I may not be much of a people person, but it's easy to congratulate someone on a successful ride, or compliment their horse once in a while.

Sheesh!

justice · Grand Prix

So here is how I REALLY feel about people in general : )

I am going to XXX. You are welcome, even wanted! but bring your own chair, pack your own lunch and wipe your own ... : ) Two out of three will get a modest effort from me, regardless of the venue (born of fatigue moreso than elite-ism).

I am not a people person, either, Ash, tho it's easier here as the people are mature, intelligent, experienced, unpretentious, even for internet communication. Interesting, too! Yes! Definitely a significantly better forum, Admin, well done! and Thank You from me, too : )

-- Edited by justice on Thursday 14th of April 2011 01:38:54 PM

MagsNMe · Advanced

My personal favourite at the barn is unsolicited advice. I really try hard to keep my trap shut, unless it's a safety issue (I still have to tackle the friend of mine who gave her horse an injection without doing a pull back first). I've been at this a long time, I know far from everything, but I do know my horse, and I pay a very good trainer good money to tell me what to do. I pay a very good vet to tell me what to do (and have Vet Med training). I pay a very good farrier to do my horses' feet and tell me what to do.

I recall we had a farrier working with an extreme laminitis case. I had TWO vets consulting and told her to do x. Based on her experience with ONE other mild laminitis case, she did y. She no longer does my horses feet, my vets horses feet, any feet out at the barn we have some horses at....

Oh dear, this really could become a rant....

Barnmouser Ash · Grand Prix

@Justice: Well said ;)

@Mags: I can't stand unsolicited advice. If you ask me for it, I will cautiously give it to you but refer you to someone I know knows better than me, when at all possible. If I ask you for advice, then that's great, and I would appreciate the favour being returned (referral to so and so who knows more, that is). But, if I am having a problem with my horse, unless I say, "what do you think I should do?" or "what would you do?", please don't tell me I'm managing my horse incorrectly. This differs from innocent suggestions (ie He's not picking up the left lead? Hmm.. have you checked for lameness?).

Every once in a while, people have to go out on a limb. However, in your case (farrier did y when x was clearly more appropriate), it's just frustrating. You can't always be the hero who had the good idea and saved the day. :)

Goatgirl · Advanced

Rudeness on line

There are some forums -horsie ones where there are sort of 'self-proclaimed' experts or whatever and if you question their oppinion - the whole board seems to jump all over you - really rudely -

Rudeness in the real world

The world is a tough enough place as it is - I just don't understand why people would want to make things unpleasant for others.

Cruelty of any kind.-

justice · Grand Prix

In the barn, lack of horsemanship. Outside, lack of humanship.

Barnmouser Ash · Grand Prix

justice wrote:
In the barn, lack of horsemanship. Outside, lack of humanship.

Perfect.

dbliron · Advanced

Wow - you guys have covered a lot of ground, and I agree with all of it.

I'd add one more little fillip: dogma and dogmatic people. We've had a few of those around Barnmice, and I'd venture to say that occasionally things have become a little ugly here too, but most of us are pretty mature in our approaches, and we find ways around those individuals.

I find this to be, in the main, an enjoyable site, with interesting discussions and sometimes very through-provoking points of view. I think it's possible to learn from most situations, and I applaud Barnmice for fostering learning and open discussions!

Barnmouser Ash · Grand Prix

db, I have to agree. Occasionally (and I think you will find this anywhere) there are some perhaps overly religious folk who may benefit from stepping back to see the whole picture once in a while. Not to say anyone's religion is wrong, but being (or trying to be) accepting of other peoples' points of view is a grand trait to have, in my books.

I also applaud Barnmice on the friendly, thought-provoking environment. I just came back over here from a few other forums I frequent, and boy-oh-boy do some of them get nasty. Some places can go 14 pages of off topic back stabbing. I'm glad Barnmice isn't the place we all come at the end of the day to rant and tear others down because we're tired/had a bad day/etc. :) Everyone here seems friendly and open. Kudos, you all.

darkhorserunning · Well Schooled

Number one thing at the farm people not putting things back where they are to go, false horse whispers,,, as i can see your choking the crap out of the horse that seems, very horse whisper like, lol. as for other forms yup they suck, hard to get a question or even answer if all people want to do is slam you and derail the whole thread i am new on here but have checked out tons of the threads and have not seen anything bad, kudos.

Barnmouser Ash · Grand Prix

darkhorse, welcome to the forum! :) We seem to share similar opinions ;) haha!

Goatgirl · Advanced

.....

Long Deep and Low ---- previously ---- Rollkur

The fact that Dressage is no longer dressage --- when did dressage become horses with bulging eyes, whirling tails and flinging legs

and doing a mechanical piaffe --- ie standing and wiggling rather than sitting down......when did it become a sport in which big and spectacular horses bouncing across the arena like peppe le pew are the high scorrers

I fell in love with dressage because it was harmony between horse and rider, a rider asking the horse to 'display its beauty' - (thank you ancient greek dude-- Xeonephon) - and the horse saying 'yep for you -- why not'

I don't see much beauty or true dressage in international grand prix anymore....

(one of the reasons I love my coach ...he doens't like what's happened to dressage either - we work not classical - not competitive but somewhere in between - happy medium and my horse is all the better for it)

Barnmouser Ash · Grand Prix

I LOL'd at standing and wiggling.
Xenophon was an incredible horseman. I've read a bit of his stuff; very interesting.

I agree, though. I would say the same about halter horses (particularly qh/paint, I mean). Bred to look like creepy body builders and hooves smaller than my wee little hands, with hind legs more vertical than the prime meridian.

justice · Grand Prix

I am liking our Goatgirl's way of thinking.... a LOT : )